Finding Success When We Fail

  It was a sultry, summer night and perfect for the greatest game on earth. You could see the last remaining flickers of light in the sky from the penetrating sun which drove the thermometer past 90 degrees earlier in the day. All of the boys of summer were getting ready to play. Game time was close at hand. He stared at me through the fence of the third base dugout. Bobby (not his real name) was getting ready to tell me something. His big brown eyes started to fill up as he uttered the words, "Coach, I can't hit, coach. When am I going to get a hit, coach?" Bobby was plagued with self-doubt at times. Baseball is as much mental as it is physical ability. However, Bobby had something that every coach, no matter where he or she is on this planet, loves more than talent and ability. He had heart. And no ability can ever supplant that in my book. His heart was the key to his success.

 I'd take nine Bobby's because not only did he have heart and determination but he had a teachable spirit. He was about five feet tall with dark brown hair. Bobby was adopted but didn't play like he was mad at the world. It didn't seem to bother him. Maybe it is what saved him. Regardless, he was playing on the All-Star team we had selected to represent our town in the district tournament. He could play a great outfield and was a coach's dream attitude-wise but to Bobby he was living a nightmare in the batter's box. Hitting equates to playing and in his 11-year old mind he didn't measure up. Little did he know he had won his coach's heart over in short order. He had my respect. You can't measure heart.

 You see Bobby equated success to getting hits. And while the purist of all baseball purists would agree, he however brought something more than hits to his team. He brought passion, fight, and a willingness to want to improve his skills. He gave one hundred percent all of the time. He listened. He hustled. He got dirty. He failed, succeeded and he left it all on the field. He was a success regardless of how many hits he did or did not get. Even as he struggled hitting and at times was over-matched Bobby never gave up. He kept working and working and working in practice. Baseball is a failure sport anyway. If you get a hit three out of ten times you are considered a success. Any math major can figure that to be less than half. Bobby may have fell short of hits but made up for it in more ways any coach could ask. Success was his. He took full advantage of his opportunity. His heart was leading him home.

 We live in a society very similar to being in the batter's box. We equate success like baseball does with base hits. Failure is less and less tolerated. Results are king. If and when you do fail people may say, "Well, you should have done this or should have done that." "I would not have done it that way." "I would have done it like this." "I would not have taken such a risk." I believe if you haven't failed then you haven't tried to push things to the edge. You haven't taken enough risks. There are different levels of risk but nonetheless they are what they are. Failure is not a bad word. It can be a gift. Trust me, I know. I hope you do too. If you don't then get back to the drawing board. Action is needed!

 There are certain aspects of our world where failure cannot happen. There are certain circles where it is not permitted. I know it and so do you. Failure of the government and our elected officials is not acceptable. We vote people in or out based on results. Well, sometimes not. I guess it depends on what your perspective is. Pardon my digression. Failure of our military is not to be tolerated. There are too many people's lives and livelihoods at stake for each. There's no doubt our elected officials (all of them) have big room for improvement. Our military put their lives in harm's way more than we could ever know. They'd be the first to tell you failure is not an option. There is too much at stake for that to be tolerated. I get it. I think we all do.

 The kind of success and failure I'm talking about has to do with what we do with the talents, abilities and gifts we've been given. It has to do with not limiting yourself because of fear of failure or of what others might think or say. People will come against your risks because it upsets their world. It makes them feel uncomfortable. Go for it. In the end it'll benefit everyone. It pushes people even when they don't want to be pushed. When you let geography, family, career or friends dictate what you can or cannot risk then you limit yourself. Neither success nor failure are reached and that does more harm than good. Bobby failed more than he succeeded in the batter's box. So did Willie Mays so he was in good company. Bobby ultimately learned to respect himself. That was great for his coach to see. It was a sweet victory in the end. Don't limit success to just results. When you fail you learn along the way. Knowledge and experience are gained. Life's a marathon. Remember, it's about the dash.